If you’ve spent any time around personal growth philosophies or spiritual teachings (I’ve explored many), you may believe that Life is a mirror and every event is trying to tell you something.
This was the take away one of my clients had, let’s call her Amy, after years of spiritual and personal exploration. And yet when Amy tried to apply this understanding to her own life she ended up feeling conflicted, disheartened and alone.
By the time Amy arrived at my door she was hurt and confused. She had stepped in to assist a family crisis only to find that her actions were fiercely criticized by her siblings.
When Amy set about applying the notion that her family was mirroring something to her, she concluded that she was somehow at fault and needed to do more soul searching to put her own house in order.
Nothing is as it appears to be
Whilst this kind of interpretation might sometimes apply, and Amy by no means claimed to be enlightened or blemish free, with some tender inquiry and clear discernment she was able to see that her devotion to living from her Heart had never been recognized or affirmed in her family.
When Amy allowed this to sink in it dawned on her that her family were simply treating her in the way they had all along. And whilst seeing this pattern was not much comfort, it did help put her pain in perspective. As a result she was able to let go the idea that she was in the wrong.
Instead, she began to dig deeper than fault finding and unearthed some buried feelings of anger. Her anger stemmed from an early conclusion that her family’s lack of acceptance equaled a rejection of her. She had taken this conclusion to be true and applied it to herself. Without knowing it, deep down she rejected the wisdom of her own Heart. This meant that many of her actions in life were a confused mix of Love and self doubt, a cocktail sure to scupper the best of intentions.
Thankfully, when Amy learned how to make friends with and steward her anger, her self doubt dissolved. Rather than feeling victim to her family’s lack of appreciation she became empowered by claiming her authentic expression of Love and caring undiluted by doubt.
What is True?
There’s no question that your experiences will show you what you need to upgrade or integrate afresh to fulfill your highest potential as a spiritual human being.
And whilst you could always claim you have more inner work to do, Life always points to what is deeper than surface appearances. It points to what is eternal and unchanging.
In Amy’s case, deeper than hurt was anger, and deeper than anger was her true power: clarity, compassion and understanding.
Amy now stands on increasingly steady feet. She is able to make decisions about when and how to interact with her family in ways which no longer expose her to betrayal. She is staying close and loyal to her Heart, shining her light on her own life more strongly. She is being and doing what is in alignment with her Heart. And she is offering an over-arching light for her family, a role she always held but needed to give herself over to unapologetically.
The Invitation When things go amiss or awry, take a moment to notice what happens. Do you interpret these moments as some kind of evidence that you are in the wrong? Or do you take a deep breath and open to a deeper Truth revealing itself to you. Consider that Life is not wagging a finger at you, you are simply receiving an invitation to dwell in your Heart where your True power lives.